WE ALL GET OLD .... If we live long enough | <– Date –> <– Thread –> |
From: Bob Heiser (w7ikt![]() |
|
Date: Sun, 18 Feb 2018 05:31:42 -0800 (PST) |
WE ALL GET OLD....
I changed my car horn to
gunshot
sounds.
People get out
of the way
faster now.
Gone are the days when girls
used to cook
like their
mothers. Now
they drink
like their
fathers.
I didn't make it to the gym
today. That
makes five
years in a
row.
I decided to stop calling
the bathroom
the "John" and
renamed it the
"Jim". I feel
so much better
saying I went
to the Jim
this morning.
Old age is coming at a
really bad
time. When I
was a child I
thought "Nap
Time" was a
punishment.
Now, as a
grownup, it
feels like a
small
vacation.
The biggest lie I tell
myself is..."I
don't need to
write that
down, I'll
remember it."
I don't have gray hair; I
have "wisdom
highlights"!
I'm just very
wise.
If God wanted me to touch my
toes, He
would've put
them on my
knees.
Last year I joined a support
group for
procrastinators.
We haven't met
yet.
Why do I have to press one
for English
when you're
just going to
transfer me to
someone I
can't
understand
anyway?
Of course I talk to myself;
sometimes I
need expert
advice.
At my age "Getting lucky"
means walking
into a room
and
remembering
what I came in
here for.
Actually I'm not complaining
because I am a
Senager.
(Senior
teenager) I
have
everything
that I wanted
as a teenager,
only 60 years
later. I don't
have to go to
school or
work. I get an
allowance
every month. I
have my own
pad. I don't
have a curfew.
I have a
driver's
license and my
own car. And
I don't have
acne. Life
is great.
I have more friends I should
send this to,
but I can't
remember their
names.
...did
I send this to
you, or did you
send it to me?
f |
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