| Fwd: Your morning laugh... |
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From: silvrbch (silvrbch cheqnet.net)
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Date: Mon, 8 Oct 2018 09:01:27 -0700 (PDT)
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Begin forwarded message:
We’re not here
for a long
time...
We’re here for
a good time
...
On
his deathbed
they asked him
where he
wanted to be
buried.
Bob
Hope replied:
"Surprise me."
I
had forgotten
that he lived
to be 100,
and also
didn't realize
it has been
over 15 years since he died.
For
those of you
too young to
remember Bob
Hope, ask your
grandparents
and thanks for
the memories.
I
HOPE THIS WILL
PUT A SMILE ON
YOUR FACE AND
IN YOUR HEART.
This
is a tribute
to a man who DID make
a difference
ON
TURNING 70 -
"I still chase
women, but
only
downhill."
ON
TURNING 80 -
"That's the
time of your
life when even
your birthday
suit needs
pressing."
ON
TURNING 90 -
"You know you
are getting
old when the
candles cost
more than the
cake."
ON
TURNING 100 -
" I don't feel
old. In fact,
I don't feel
anything until
noon. Then
it's time for
my nap."
ON
GIVING UP HIS
EARLY CAREER
(BOXING) -
"I ruined my
hands in the
ring. The
referee kept
stepping on
them."
ON
GOLF -
"Golf is my
profession.
Show business
is just to pay
the green
fees."
ON
PRESIDENTS -
"I have
performed for
12 presidents
but
entertained
only six."
ON
WHY HE CHOOSE
SHOWBIZ FOR
HIS CAREER -
"When I was
born, the
doctor said to
my mother,
congratulations,
you have an
eight pound
ham."
ON
RECEIVING THE
CONGRESSIONAL
GOLD MEDAL -
"I feel very
humble, but I
think I have
the strength
of character
to fight it."
ON
HIS FAMILY'S
EARLY POVERTY -
"Four of us
slept in the
one bed. When
it got cold,
mother threw
on another
brother."
ON
HIS SIX
BROTHERS -
"That's how I
learned to
dance. Waiting
for the
bathroom."
ON
HIS EARLY
FAILURES -
"I would not
have had
anything to
eat if it
wasn't for the
stuff the
audience threw
at me."
ON
GOING TO
HEAVEN -
"I have done
benefits for
ALL religions.
I would hate
to blow the
hereafter on a
technicality."
Dear
Lord -
Please give me
a sense of
humor,
give me the
grace to see a
joke,
to get some
humor out of
life,
and pass it on
to other folk.
To
the person
receiving
this, please
have the grace
to pass it on
to others.
    
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