AlamoPA Mailing List: Fwd: FAQ'a for us older folks

[M.J. Trebenskie (skie999]

 

Subject: FAQ'a for us older folks

 

 

 

 

 

Questions and Answers
Q:   Where can single men over the age of 70 find  younger women who are interested in them?	A:   Try a bookstore, under  Fiction.
Q:   What can a man do while his wife is going  through menopause?	A:   Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can  finish the basement.  When you're done, you will have a place to  live.
Q:   Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible... Is that true?  Where can it be  found?	A:   Yes. Matthew 14:92:  "And Mary rode  Joseph's ass all the way to   Egypt."
Q:   How can you increase the heart rate of your  over-70 year-old husband?	A:   Tell him you're  pregnant.
Q:   How can you avoid that terrible curse of the  elderly wrinkles?	A:   Take off your  glasses.
Q:   Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet  and all those wrinkles on my face?	A:   Go braless. It will usually pull them  out..
Q:   Why should 70-plus year old people use valet  parking?	A:   Valets don't forget where they park your  car.
Q:   Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have  problems with  short term memory storage?	A:   Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it  is the problem.
Q:   As people age, do they sleep more soundly?	A:   Yes, but usually in the  afternoon.
Q:   Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye  glasses?	A:   On their  foreheads.
Q:   What is the most common remark made by 70-plus  year olds when they enter antique stores?	A:   "Gosh, I remember  these!"
SMILE,  You've still got your sense of  humour, haven't you?